Hmmm, let’s see how things are going on my deviantart page.
Well, that’s troubling. *Drinks his hot chocolate like a boss* I mean, what am I going to do when it comes to these blog riffs. How am I going to survive? I mean, it’s not like I have a blog where I can do the excat same thing as I did on the deviantart page. A blog that hasn’t been updated in a while and considering the Irategamersucks is still up, I have a lot more leeway.
Oh...wait, I do.
Mykan, dear...I’m back!
So, let’s talk about some of his blog posts while waiting for the next big chapter. First off is one where he tries and defend his little offing of the wee babe Flurry Heart. In his fic that I am sure is more like a Godfrey Ho film, End of Ends featuring the ponies. Or, as I am offically dubbing it “Titanic Ninja: The rebirth.”
For those who can't stand gore, do not read this
-Well, I would, but there is a little problem. I need to do something in between my job, writing an epic fic, writing Christmas stories, listening to Sia christmas songs, and thinking of what to buy my family. I need this to let off steam.
(and it's all talk about story plotting)
-Once again, let me do some math here
You+Not+Writer=YOU NO WRITER!!!!
You can’t really be talking about plot.
As you know,
-Never use as you kno-
Oh, sorry, I hate it when characters give out plot exposition with that phrase
-I am sorry, but you mean “Titanic Ninja: The rebirth” Starring Chris O’Donnel as Robin, Tara Strong as Twilight Sparkle, Brad Jones as the Cinema Snob, Diamanda Hagan as the Hopping Woman, Eric Roberts as Count Logan, Eric Freeman as Ricky Caldwell, and Pirre Kirby as Jack Tracer Frost, ex-FBI CIA ninja warrior from Tibet who gave up his warrior ways to live a peacful life with his daughter but was dragged back into war when his old nemsis came back from the dead as ressurected by Cannibals to kidnap his daughter and love interest and has to battle his way using his old ninja magic as trained to him by his ninja master as played by old unused Bruce Lee footage from outtakes on Enter the Ninja. Directed by Godfrey Ho and Produced by Tommy Weisseau.
The plot is very simple: A great evil is destroying all worlds and killing all life, and eventually comes to Equestria.
-Twilight: *Sighs* Take a number
Logan: Why am I here bub?
Count Logan: Number? *Pauses and looks down the road to see Titan, the villian from Sunset of Time, The unamed from perspective, and Mirage*
The enemy, "Count Logan" demonstrates his cruelty and power by killing Discord,
-But of course. In spite of that making no sense and he lacks any real power and/or menace. But, go ahead, please tell me more of your badass villian OC who is better than cannon. He will go lovely with the dozen other ones I met.
but then there was a case of Flurry Heart.
-...Wait, what? Oh sweet baby Celestia this is gonna be good. Prepare thy anus.
The plot was simple: Flurry Heart escaped from the safety of her loved ones, and foolishly attempted to attack Logan,
-Mykan thinks that babies would do this. I don’t know if this is an isult to his own villian to say that he is so not scary that even babies laugh at him or that he is so insane that he thinks babies attack random things.
but he intercepts her, twists her head and pulls it off like a cork.
-Hehheh, oh, I am laughing, but...well, I’ll get to this in a moment. Just let him have his say.
(Yeah, sick I know)
-Hahahaha
Keep in mind, this is GORE fic, there has be scary and sick deaths like that
-HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!Ok, I am sorry, but now I have to say why I am laughing. See, it isn’t so much that a child is dead or he killed it in such a way. But the fact is that he thinks that using words like “Twist off like a cork” and “Spewing blood everywhere” is anything resembling gore. If anything, it’s like reading baby’s first violent scene. IT’s adorable coming from him. But, there is a lot more to the problems with this than just the fact that he can’t write gore (Because, he thinks way too much in the PG spectrum, to the poinnt where his so called gore is nothing more than what you would see on say, a shonen anime.)
It’s the way he wrote it and the use of the phrase, “Like a cork.”
See, I try to advoid similies in my writing because that becomes a cheap way to write in my eyes. And in this case, it’s actually pretty childish and becomes comical in it’s description. IT comes off more as a joke than what it supposed to be, a horrific event that is supposed to terrify you and make you go “eeeewwww.” Instead, I find myself laughing at it.
Now, there are ways to do a baby murder. See Bram Stoker’s dracula for more.
(A baby or not)
-Again, that you wrote in such a way I thought I was watching a comedy.
Instead I was advised not to do, and scorned for even thinking of doing it!
-As you should be! Or at least get some talent! Again, I think you are missing the real reason why people are upset that you did this. It isn’t just that you did this, it’s that you wrote it like a child would. You wrote it in such an immature fasion that no one will take it seriously.
I warned the adviser: "Even if I don't do it, nothing will change
-You know what’s funny, the advisor actually took the time to come and try and defend you. He actually tried to stand up for you and what happened? You do what you always do...push the person away.
To which the adviser objected and suggested that "Yes it will. People will not scorn you as much"
-And of course, you listened and instead wrote it so that there was no baby death at all...
So I tested the theory, and I posted it with a initial DIFFERENT PLOT.
-Or you could always remind me why I should never give you credit.
Alternate plot: Logan never pulled off Flurry's head.
-Hurrah!
Instead, Flurry and Shining Armor both perished in a gas explosion as Equestria began to crumple
-Harru!
(Seconds away from total destruction) so they were killed anyway,
-My god, can you ever write a death scene that...
Doesn’t leave me laughing on my sides? I mean, sweet baby Celestia. You need to be able to make it harsh and painful sounding. When one writes a death, it needs to mean something and be impactful. Having characters die in a gas explosion not really all that harsh or impactful. This is just “And they died.”
Then again, I have read your Twilight Sparkle death fic...and boy was it lame.
I didn't have Flurry's head pulled off.
-You just went siller. The real idea was to NOT having a baby death in the first place.
And guess what, I STILL got scorned for it anyway.
-Oh really? Well, let’s see the comments. Oh, wait, you deleted those, so now it’s just a “take my word for it.” kind of situation. Now you are just trying to make yourself look like the innocent litte victim while we are the big bad boogeymen who won’t let you do what you want ;’(
People gave me grief for even THINKING of having flurry's head pulled off. So the adviser was WRONG...
-Gee, maybe that was because it was stupid idea that really didn’t add anything to the story? Nah, can’t be that.
I followed the advice, I initially didn't make Flurry's head get pulled off,
-There is a probelm with the grammer here, I just can’t see it.
and SURPRISE... NOTHING CHANGED!!! I still got scorned for it, I still got grief...
-Gee, it’s almost like killing a baby is a stupid idea that should be treated with respect and not just because you touch yourself when you torture Cadence.
Therefore the advice from the adviser did no good! I still got scorned even though I didn't post Flurry being beheaded at the start.
-It’s not like I wrote a comical scene of a baby diing in a gas chamber or somethinge.
Now then, let's look at the advice form another point.
-Yes, in that there is a way to write a baby death. Usually off screen where it can be more impactful. See, the prinicipal here is setting and mood.
The adviser advised me NOT TO POST IT (Getting deities and religion talk involved)
-How the hell were deities involved here? He just said for the love of god, be smart and don’t post it.
Could that have meant, "don't post the fic/chapter ENTIRELY"
-Or he could just be saying don’t post a scene of a baby death and just write a different scene that doesn’t involve a baby dieng at all.
That advice is just as awful as the "Don't pull Flurry's head off": The story is already in motion, I can't just leave the chapter BLANK. The fic has to continue.
-Again, don’t write the death! That simple! Just write a scene of them escaping or not even mention Flurry Heart at all since she really doens’t contribute anything to the story, such as it is.
See, here is the biggest issue with his way of thinking. He is trying to look at it only one way, and worse...he is trying something that he isn’t good at. He is trying to write gore and a baby death. And to quote the Critic “Warning, you are not talented enough for this.”
Real writiers can pull it off well. I didn’t even need to show Kudos killing the babies to get his point across, just say it and that was haunting enough. This is just what happens when you have a guy who just writes random moments from DBZ that he thinks are cool.
even if I didn't write the fic, nothing will change, I still got scorned, and plus that means I let people push me around and tell what to do and how to make MY STORIES the way I WANT THEM!!
-Wow, how arrogantly selfish of you to think that way. Are you so self centered to think that the only way to do things are yours and that it is impossible to listen to other’s advice. And again, people stick up for this guy! People will actually defend him!
Plus, if I had taken the story down,
-Wich would be smart since it’s just a rehash of a rehash of a rehash. That really, has bearly any connection to ponies at all.
or just posted a chapter of not pulling flurry's head off,
-Agin, this is the smart thing to do and you are going to throw a tamprum in 3,2,1-
I would be very angry:
-You know, I bet I could make money formualizing these rants. Hey, Mykan, pay me some dough and I bet I could make your next ten rants!!!!
I let people push me around, I didn't get to do what I wanted,
-Oh boo hoo, I actually did something likable and respectable and now people are starting to like me. It is so hard to deal with the idea that people actually want to be around me.
and if anyone tried to say NICE things
-You’ll push them away because who needs people liking me right?
about me for not pulling Flurry's head (they wouldn't anyway cuz I proved they still scorned me)
-Maybe it doesn’t help that you killed a baby because you like the idea of torturing a mare who’s only crime is to be happy.
I'm afraid I'd just have to scorn them and be grumpy and angry about it, not wishing to accept praise
-Because I am a little coward, really. If you come at me and growl in real life I tend to cry.
"for being a weakling and taking bad advice that didn't work anyway"
-Yeah, how dare I take advice and become a better person. This will show me!
So there, the advice was no good AGAIN!!
-Right and now for my opinion on the subject I-
I DON'T have Flurry's head pulled off: I get scorned.
-Have to listen to more of this *Brings out Pokemon Sun and Moon*
I DO have her her head pulled: I STILL get scorned
-*Still playing*
I DON'T post the story: I get scorned
-*Still playing*
I DO post the story: I still get scorned.
-*Finishing playing* Are you done yet? You know, I am trying to figure out who is scorning you for not posting something and I am seeing nothing. Maybe if you left up comments, but nah...that’s acking way too much.
Either way, nothing will have changed. I told this to the adviser, the adviser did not listen, and then the adviser turned on me,
-Yes, and then he took off the blog where he DEFENDED you, and was nice enough to support you. Don't you just love it when a guy goes out of his way to push others out of his life. It’s, Karma really.
even though IT WAS THEIR advice that failed/would have failed in the first place. (I got scorned no matter what was done)
-Because it was all their fault! I am an innocnet! This is not projecting!
So I changed the chapter, which DOES have Flurry getting her head pulled off...
-Again, in a downright silly and utterly rediculous way that makes some of my hate fics look serious!
Now, here's my defense
-I would get Phenoix Wright here, but he is kid of busy
(And if you deny this, then people are more ridiculous than I thought)
-Wow, what a way to build your case there. If you disagree with me you are an idoit. Gee, I wonder if I could get away with that on a national debate?
1: This is a rated M fic, IT HAS GORE IN IT...
-Sadly, you write gore like you write everything else...poorly. Worse, you write it in such a childlike manner that you really think that the phrase “Blood spewing everywhere” is something that pops up in a mature story when it’s something you would see in a pg 13 story!
and it's SUPPOSED to have horrific scenes like that. Be it a baby, a todler, a kid or an adult... There's BLOODSHED!!
-Yes, but we want real bloodshed! And in such a way that is done to make it look like you didn’t pull it out of your ass and more importantly...
Not because you want to torture the characters.
2: Count Logan and his minions are trying to "Destroy all Worlds" that means they are also plotting to "KILL EVERYONE"
-Yes, because you just want to prove he is evil and up the ante yadda yadda.
Ok kids, gather around, it’s time for some more literary theory from Uncle Legendbringer. Who is a STFU with a UY in writing.
See, there is a couple of way of breaching a subject like killing children and especially babies.
so more than just one little baby is going to be killed.
-Shut up Mykan the adults are talking.
See, killing a child is normally regarded as a very VERY bad thing. Sure, there is a joke about how someone just wants to murder the kid or a jerk will say “I hate the kids and they should all die.” but in truth, unless you are a sociopath, you don’t really want the kids or babies to die. Because they are innocent and most likely don’t even know about the wrongness of what they are doing.
So, how do you write a child or baby’s death properly? In two ways actually...
One is just by being silly and over the top. Take for instance Escaflwone abridged where Dilandau (A maniac) is given a snack in the form of a baby. He then eats the baby and that is actually hilarious becasue of it’s over the topness. Will it go over well? Well it all depends on the viewer and the way trhe joke is told. I could tell a joke about a parent killing their kids, but not everyone will enjoy it. That is, sadly, the nature of comedy. One will find a joke hilarious while the other will just smack their heads in shame.
The other way is to treat it as serious as you can. This is whay Mykan was trying to accomplish. However, as previously stated, using a simile is an amature way and something that professional writers tend to advoid a lot. Because using a simile is kind of basically saying “I can’t describe something so here is what it’s supposed to be like.” Not to mention, saying ‘Like a Cork’ is actually a comical way of saying it. It turns what is supposed to be horrifying into a comical show.
Now, lets compare to when I have Kudos say he basically killed a foals ward. He was cold and the scene was treated with all of the seriousness it needed. Also see Bram stoker’s Dracula where he only needed to describe a baby being given to the brides in order to put it into out heads.
Hell, even DBZ knows this and shows it well when they have Freeza blow Dende away with a single shot.
(It doesn't matter at all how Flurry Heart is killed. In the end, SHE'S DEAD!!
-And it shows how bad my villian is without really estabilishing anything!!! Because killing a child right out will help establish your villian.
Sadly, it doesn’t and really comes off like you are trying too hard. While I never had Kudos do it on screen, the fact that he alluded to it was all you really needed in order to get my point across.
It's as simple as that. ALL OF EQUESTRIA has been destroyed, and only the mane 6 Cadance and the royal sisters are left)
-Because how else am I going to torture Cadence?
Even the adviser gave more FAILING advice and suggested "ever heard of a heroic sacrifice" That does not mean anything...
-Well, it means a lto. It shows that you have respect for the character...something you do not understand.
THE BABY IS GOING TO DIE REGARDLESS!! (Again, the advice failed)
-Why do I imagine you hear advice and just put your fingers into your ears and start screeching “Nononononononoonononononononononono!”
3: My plot of killing Flurry Heart in the fic, as well as destroying all worlds DOES NOT make me a baby murderer,
-Yes it does
a sicko,
-Oh it does
and it does not describe me as a person.
-It really, REALLY does. Mainly because of how you wrote it. If you wrote it like an adult, maybe we would believe you, but by writing it in such a childish manner, you make us think that you have no desire to treat it professionally.
Especialy since you-
It's just a fanfic. A fictional story. These are CARTOON CHARACTERS, not living beings.
-Treat them like you do everything else, as little throwaway characters that no one cares about. You just do it to get your jollies off and this makes one think that you are doing this to get one off.
I don't care what you people may think (As a hater puts it) "They may cartoons, but they are real to me. They resemble living beings"
-I would say that this is me, but I haven’t been riffing in a while, must be someone else.
BIG WHOOP!! They're STILL... NOT... REAL!!
-And as long as they’re not real, it doens’t matter how many times I kill them. NMuhahahhahahahhah!!!!
I can do as I please with them, It's MY STORY.
-There are still rules one must follow. It doens’t matteer if its your story or not, if it still sucks, it still sucks.
and it does not make me some kind of sicko, or baby murderer...
-Yep it does.
(Or as a friend told me last night)
-I am shocked, shocked! Oh, not by the line below, but that he still has friends he hasn’t pushed away yet.
Otherwise, By that same Logic anyone who ever written anything about killing, death or anything would be a murder, and it doesn't make a difference how they portray it .
He's right,
-Nope, he’s kind of wrong on all accounts. First of all, all of those guys...they font’ do it to torture a person just because they are happy and you are not. Second, they treat it with respect. And third, are we sure that this friend exists?
it makes no difference whatsoever how it's portrayed.
-Oh, god no it’s a youtube video and its of...New York going bye bye. Well, lets see what is some of the problems here *Watches and smirks* Oh this is gonna be fun!
See all that? It makes no difference HOW it's portrayed it's still done.
-Considering I think you probably have never watched Ghostbusters beyond a few random clips. I think you don’t realize the stupitity of the above.
Yet when I make things like this, I get scorned for even coming up with an IDEA of plotting it for stories (It doesn't matter how it's portrayed or why)
-Because you are doing this for what reason was it again?
THAT INCLUDES MY HATING/TORTURING CADANCE...
-Yep, there we go. And hey, my voice feels larger.
IT DOESN'T COUNT!!
-Turn down the volume!
Thank you
So if I deemed sick and stupid for making scenes in my stories, aren't all these movie makers and book writers sick too?
-Nope, but that is because they are trying to tell an interesting story about disaters and the human condition. You are telling a story about a crybaby who is not getting the woman he wants.
does make them sickos and murderers and insane people?
-Nope, but they also don’t spend a few pages trying to defend their stupidity and ignore basic human thought.
...Wake up people! It's just fiction! You still have a problem with it? Sucks to be you then!
-They also don’t say the above.
So, to conclude, this is why I usually refuse advice...
-Because you are a selfish, aggorgant, egotistical, sel-centered, asswipe?
The advice is either...
-Here we go!
-Incorrect
-Because they just got to know me.
-Will not work
-Because I cannot do anything that isn’t making people butt hurt.
-Will only make things worse.
-Because if I do one thing to make my world better, then I fail as a human being.
And it looks like I've proven it did.
-Nope you just proven how much you are an egotist!
The adviser (Like most people I've dealt with)
-Who were actually on my side, but in my own self loating, tend to push away.
have given horrible advice that doesn't work even if it's tried (I tried it, and it failed miserably)
-You tried poorly.
I initially didn't make Flurry's head get pulled off, and things didn't improve.
-You know, I really don’t believe you on this. I really don’t. But, then again, I think you are the ind of guy who wants instant satisfaction rather than waiting for it to come from hard work.
People are not concerned with Writing Justice, they are only concerned in bullying and egging people on,
-You know, I could have a field day with this and writing it psycolgically.
(Heavily proven by the people scorning me for NOT initially posting it but rather just THINKING of it, and for over-blowing things about FICTIONAL CHARACTERS in a FICTIONAL STORY)
-Yeah, because, you don’t do that at all!
I'm not the one who's in the wrong here. They are...
which is why I wash my hands at their advice. I am not interested in any advice that...
-Will do the most horrible thing ever and make you work for it.
-Will not work
-Translation: That will make me try to think of new plots and a new way of writing stories.
-Ruin things
-Translation: Make me improve myself and having to stop torturing people.
-The people don't even want their OWN advice taken anyway.
-Translation:...What?
That's the way it goes, and those who deny all this and scorn me for all this still... WOW! Way to prove me no right there is no actual justice around here.
-Justice, what justice? This is not about justice...this is an excution.
Oh, wait, I got another one
This isn’tJustice, it’s punishment.
Until Next time, Mykan signing off.
And that is the end of the blog, but don't worry...I'll be back.
